So like…here’s the story. They’ve been together a while but one night they’re sorta lying around and Tony goes “We should date”. And Steve’s like “I thought we WERE dating” *blank stare* “Oh okay. We should date. I can clearly see the difference in what you meant so if you’d like to elaborate on proper dating….” “Like go on dates and stuff. Like…dinner and a movie. I could take you to dinner and a movie”
And somehow THAT got turned into THE BIG ELABORATE FIRST DATE. Because they’re both suckers for classic tv/movie tropes they get decked out to the NINES which for Tony meant almost a whole suit (which just the vest tie and shirt alone were more than the entire apartment’s rent for the year) and Steve put on his favorite nice shirt…which was trouble in and of itself because he really only owns plaid nice shirts, like where was ANYONE when he was buying clothes? Grandma you couldn’t come in on this one and say maybe a nice navy blue shirt might have been a good idea?
Anyway, the date was supposed to be super classic and super CLASSY but not TOO classy because that’s uncomfortable and somewhere along the lines one of their friends(probably Clint, because the guy can keep a secret IF HE WANTS TO…which only ever works when the secret is Natasha’s or if he’s hiding food from Steve) catches wind of THE DATE and somehow it becomes Operation: CRASH THE DATE.
So the movie gets ruined because the group of them sit RIGHT behind Steve and Tony and instead of heckling the movie they heckle the date. “OOOOOOH HAND HOLDIIIIIIING GUUUUUURL”(mostly Clint) And then they get bombarded at Stanley’s and its not like they can really say “HEY GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE” because no one talks back to Carol or Natasha and Thor would just push them down in a hearty laugh and Clint would(and isn’t going to anyway) let them hear the end of it.
Wanda would have teased them more but she was too worried about her brother who kept following Operation:CRASH THE DATE around with Operation: WANDAAAAAAA
(oh. Loki had nothing to do with Operation: Date/Crash the Date/WANDAAA. He’s just not allowed in Stanley’s anymore. Not since he set that table on fire. Too bad. They make an excellent pizza)
4. On a date.